Starting over is always hard. Where do you begin? How do you end something that you love, but you get no recognition for your efforts???
In my few decades of being here on earth, I've had to learn to let go and adjust to new situations. I left, even if that meant leaving something I loved.
Eventually, you feel no joy in it. Or better yet, there are others that will sour your moment.
My favorite job, believe it or not, was working at a video store. I never thought I would love it because I was never much of a movie goer. I'm more of a musical kind of gal....I always have been. But because I have one of those what you call eidetic memories, my job was a piece of cake.
People could literally walk in and ask, "Do you have this movie...I don't know the name of it, but it's about this boy and this girl..." And I would interrupt them by saying, "Yup, right over here." I would show them the exact movie and they'd be like, "But how did you know? I didn't even give you a full description of the movie yet." I'd just shrug....It's not like I've watched the movie, but I have read the synopsis, and that always gave me insight into the predictability of the movie.
This job was easy and convenient. It always worked around my schedule like taking my son to school and doctors and such.
Slowly but surely...About eight years into the job, I started hating it. Five years had passed, and the only reason I was even permitted a raise was because minimum wage had went up.
Meanwhile, a co-worker that kept quitting and coming back, was getting paid more than me. This person was lazy and only knew in-depth knowledge of video games. They were too...What's the word I'm looking for...Show off-y when it came to movies.
"Well, the director didn't do his BEST work here and..."
Oh, Puhleese!!! Let me break out the violin...
I only found out this person was making more because their pay stub fell out of their pocket. I was insulted because this person was lazy, hardly worked, and YOUNGER than me. WTF???? Really?
So a year later, I decided it was best for me to focus on my studies and focus on homeschooling my son. Then Andy (my other half) got sick.
My point is, you have to weigh the good and the bad. If the bad is starting to outweigh the good, it's time to move on.
I thought joining a blogging group would be useful for me. For one thing, it helps me to be a little bit more creative for when my muse decides to leave me every now and then.
But last week, I realized that no one is actually paying attention to what I'm writing.
I wrote a piece from a story I'm working on. I left that note in the beginning telling them this. Then again, I tell others my name is Diana, and no one spells it right...So I don't know why I should be so insulted.
But some days...I get annoyed, and then I re-evaluate my priorities in life.
Today, I was supposed to blog about my hair, but I felt I needed to get this out there.
The positive side to blogging in the group is:
1.) I have about five real followers that pay attention to what I write.
2.) It helps me to be more creative with my writes.
3.) I get more socially active with others...But even when I comment on their posts...Like leaving a story behind, I get a reply of, "Thanks, Diana!" So now, I just leave a, "Nice write," and I like the post. What do you want me to say???
4.) I thought I had one, but nope, I lost my train of thought...
The negative side to blogging in the group is:
1.) They pick out one word or sentence I've written that did not pertain to my write, and they feel the need to comment on it. And the thing is, I don't see why my posts would go ignored. In groups like that, I have a rule for myself: No more than 500 words, so that way they can focus on other posts as well because there are quite a few bloggers in that group. So I do try to keep it to a minimum.
I try to keep it to a minimum here too, but some days...AH! I feel like my head is going to EXPLODE if I don't let it all out...
2.) Actually, the first one was about reasons 2, 3, and 4, all rolled into one...Moving on...
5.) The tags!!!! Ay! Dios Mio!!! I cannot believe how many people tag me in their blogs. I remember the old days of Myspace where people would comment on my blogs and go, "Hey, can you check out my blog, *insert link here*. Thanks." And I'd be like, "*pfft* NO! You didn't even leave me a comment on my blog, but you expect me to reciprocate? Um, HELL NO!!!"
I don't tag anyone but the admin of the group because that's what the admin prefers, and I respect other's wishes. If I were to tag these people the way they tag me, I'd probably have no friends....In fact....No, let me save that for another day.
Well, as you can see, I have three for positive, and five for negative.
It's time for me to shoo bee do bee do on out of there....and move on.
That's cool, because now I can do things like set my standards higher like write my story....Try to work on at least 200 or more words per day, and write a daily blog, perhaps???
I'm getting ahead of myself. We shall see.
~~DJ
